Put Yourself First, Unapologetically

SOMEWHERE ALONG THE WAY, A LOT OF US WERE TAUGHT THAT PUTTING OURSELVES FIRST IS SELFISH. THAT CHOOSING OUR OWN NEEDS OVER SOMEONE ELSE’S MEANS WE’RE DOING SOMETHING WRONG. AND FOR A WHILE, I BELIEVED THAT TOO.

RECENTLY I FOUND MYSELF IN A SITUATION THAT DIDN’T FEEL RIGHT ANYMORE—ONE OF THOSE STICKY, COMPLICATED SPACES WHERE YOUR MIND IS CONSTANTLY PULLING IN DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS. AT FIRST, I FELT GUILTY FOR EVEN QUESTIONING IT. GUILTY FOR WANTING MORE. GUILTY FOR FEELING LIKE I DESERVED SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

BUT HERE’S THE TRUTH I HAD TO LEARN THE HARD WAY: THIS IS MY LIFE.

AND IF I’M NOT LIVING IT IN A WAY THAT FEELS ALIGNED, PEACEFUL, AND TRUE TO WHO I AM—THEN WHAT AM I DOING?

WE SPEND SO MUCH TIME WORRYING ABOUT DISAPPOINTING OTHERS, ABOUT BEING “TOO MUCH” OR “NOT ENOUGH,” THAT WE FORGET WE’RE ALLOWED TO CHOOSE OURSELVES. NOT JUST SOMETIMES. CONSISTENTLY.

BECAUSE IMAGINE THIS—IF WE ALL SPENT OUR LIVES PUTTING EVERYONE ELSE’S NEEDS BEFORE OUR OWN, WE WOULDN’T CREATE A WORLD FULL OF SATISFIED PEOPLE. WE’D CREATE A WORLD FULL OF RESENTMENT, BURNOUT, AND QUIET UNHAPPINESS.

CHOOSING YOURSELF ISN’T SELFISH. IT’S NECESSARY.

GROWTH REQUIRES CHANGE. AND CHANGE CAN FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE, EVEN SCARY. BUT ENTERTAINING SOMETHING THAT NO LONGER SERVES YOU JUST TO KEEP THE PEACE? THAT COSTS YOU FAR MORE IN THE LONG RUN.

SO STAND ON BUSINESS.

REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE. REMEMBER WHAT YOU’RE CAPABLE OF. REMEMBER THAT YOU DON’T NEED PERMISSION TO EVOLVE, TO WALK AWAY, OR TO CHOOSE BETTER FOR YOURSELF.

AND IF THAT MAKES OTHER PEOPLE UNCOMFORTABLE? THAT’S OKAY.

YOU’RE NOT HERE TO LIVE A LIFE THAT LOOKS GOOD TO EVERYONE ELSE. YOU’RE HERE TO LIVE A LIFE THAT FEELS RIGHT TO YOU.

AT THE END OF THE DAY, CONFIDENCE ISN’T JUST ABOUT WHAT YOU WEAR—IT’S ABOUT HOW YOU SHOW UP FOR YOURSELF. IT’S ABOUT MAKING DECISIONS THAT HONOR YOUR NEEDS, YOUR GROWTH, AND YOUR FUTURE.

SO WEAR THE BIKINI. TAKE UP SPACE. MAKE THOSE WAVES. CHOOSE YOURSELF.

EVERY SINGLE TIME.